First Responders Auction Outstanding

April 24, 2018

“Art enables us to find ourselves and lose ourselves at the same time.” Thomas Merton. 

 

 

Generally, art is displayed on the back drop of white walls while buyers sip wine to admire the soft brush strokes upon the canvases, but this past weekend, the citizens of Santa Ramona were privy to a different type of art show that indeed might make one lose themselves and find themselves while posed against the beautiful back drop of our very own California skies with an opening show by the Santa Ramona Cheerleaders. The auction was sponsored by the Hotel Cortez with the Hotel's owner, Sarina Jade, serving as both Hostess and Auctioneer for the physique art of the human body...in the flesh...no less.  

 

The Artful citizens being sold came attired in many different forms and fashions from the attire of a first responder to formal wear to scantily dress to show off the brush strokes given them by divine intervention, and it was indeed divine to see the contours of the art so amply displayed having most citizens in attendance fanning themselves.  One up for bid, Dante Dane, made sure to drive up the bids as he disrobed from the jacket of his Fire Department uniform to give all an ample view. 
 
 

 

The event was an outstanding effort to raise funds for first responders here in Santa Ramona and raise funds is EXACTLY what it did.  Many of Santa Ramona citizens joined at main peer to bid for a date with some eligible physiques in Santa Ramona. While the bidding may have started out slowly, by the end it would rival any art auction at Sotheby with the highest bid reaching 700, 000.00.  The owner of the Cortez put it best with, ". "Oh god. The bidding was insane that night! First, Dante sold for 26,000 to Layla. I thought that was fantastic that it got that high.  Then Derric went for $700,000! And Gianna went for 300,00. I gotta tell you I didn't know there were so many rich people in this town." 

Even with this type of bidding for a date, the big surprise it seems came with an anonymous donation of eight million...yes you read it right...eight million dollars allowing the final total for the event to be  $9,160,450.  This sum will be divided equally among the First Responder Organizations giving each a cool $3,053,483 for building maintenance, new vehicles perhaps, and hopefully raises for those that risk their lives to save the citizens of Santa Ramona.  

It will be interesting to see how these "purchased" dates unveil and whether or not in the end the bidder feel they got their thousands worth as there were not pennies to be found at this prestigious auction, leaving this reporter thinking she needs to find the Santa Ramona Gold Mine!

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