The Santa Ramona Chronicles

Local News & Events

Paper shredders are a must have for any office but are especially important for those in public office.  The following draft was found in a puddle near the dumpster at city hall.  

"Office of the Mayor

To: Sarina Jade-Rameriez, SPRD Labor
    Governor Jay Stone
    ADA Jordan Russo
    Chief of Staff E. Stone.
    Fire Chief Dimitri Rousseau
    City Manager Frank Castle

Last night the Mayor made the statement that the "Last Best Offer" will be implemented at 1200am on Saturday 5-4-2019.  

As this council has seen fit to act unlawfully, it is my duty to consider a few options.

First as to the unlawful actions.

1.  Seating the striking Mrs Jade-Rameriez during a Council meeting.  As she was on strike at the time, she should not have had a seat at the Council Table.  She should have addressed the Council as a member of the public.

2.  The presence of the SRPD Strikers in the Chamber.  As they were unruly and making comments thro...

April 14, 2019

A City Hall council meeting that took place  Friday the 12th of April saw the approval and passing of two proposals.

The first proposal put forward to the council and citizens by Chief Jade of the Santa Ramona Police Department was a scheme to introduce bounty hunters in a scheme to help Police bring vigilantes and criminals wanted by the law into custody.

Chief Jade spoke about the scheme;

 "I'm looking forward to seeing if this bounty hunter group will help Santa Ramona deal with some of the issues we have with crime. If we don't see any advantages to it within a few months, then we can evaluate but I think the citizens deserve to see criminals brought to justice. Bounty Hunters will be in a better position to find the criminals where they are hiding and bring them to justice. Hopefully, this will give victims a greater sense of justice than we have now."

The Chief received a unanimous vote of approval and it appears the scheme was supported by the council members but reportedly the May...

April 9, 2019

The Extreme Cook Off Contest and fund raiser held on Sunday 7th April at 2pm took p

lace on Old High street, in the public space between Santa Ramona Hospital, the Fire Department and Police precinct.
 Turn out was high and the various booths representing different restaurants and businesses or departments served delicious dishes as well as providing games. Altogether $3000 was raised for the Natural Disaster Relief and Recovery fund.
 The Winner of the Extreme Cook Off Contest for first place was the Fire Department. Chief Dimitri Rousseau spoke about the win to Santa Ramona Chronicles;  "We couldn't have won without our FD chef Serina Del Nero. I hired her in hopes of her makin' her mark on the cuisine at FD an she has done that very well, winnin' us first prize at this contest, the fund raiser fa Natural Disaster Relief an Recovery funds. 
Serina deserves this victory an' she also put on a great show with the band she's with, Ashes--playin together with Asher, Joanne an...

April 2, 2019

Life gets busy and things get forgotten, however forgetting your duties as a citizen should not be missed.  Part of being a citizen in our community is paying your citations, serving your time/fine/requirements in your court cases and showing up to court when you have been summoned.  Failing to do so can result in more fines and even jail time.

The Santa Ramona Police Department and Courthouse would like to offer those that have fallen behind a one time shot to get things taken care of.  You will not be penalized and will have a week to finish the requirements, pay your fines, turn yourself in, etc and clear up what you have forgotten.  

This amnesty runs out at noon at 4/10/2019 and may never present itself again.  If you have not satisfied the requirements of your citations or warrants by that time, you can and likely will, be arrested.

KELDA LOU (tequilastone)- Unpaid Citation
MIRA PAVOLOVA (howlet) - Unpaid Citation
Tomas Wot - Unpaid Fines
Annia Beatriz Vidal - Unpaid Cita...

December 17, 2018

Thank you all who participated.  Almost $24,000 was raised.  Below is a list of the winners.

Win a date with Anna Berg: $200 to Jasper Cross 

VIP Membership at Black Thorn Club $600 to Jasper Cross 

Diving Lesson: $150 to Angelyna Bennett 

A Christmas Story: $200 to Azariah Brentt 

Take Control with Eve: $200 to Allie Brentt 

Ghost Hunt or Reading with Jasper: $400 to Lakeisha Andrews 

Dinner & Lingerie: $1000 to Frank Castle

Massage Therapy: $1000 to Frank Castle  & $500 to Victor Rolakov

Finger Bang Salon: $250 to Rhi Dahl & $60 to Eve Stone 

Dinner with the Gov: $5001 to Kasandra 

Dinner with the Mayor: $2000 to Lillian Llewellyn 

2019 Lexus RX: $5001 to Kasandra Morgan  

2019 Audi A4: $2000 to Lakeisha Andrews 

$40 Gift Card Creamy Centers: $60 to Rhi Dahl and $20 to Angelyna Bennett (bittersting)

Custom Outfit By Chi Villanova: $5001 to Kasandra Morgan  & $400 to Lakeisha Andrews 

Rock Hard Gym Membership: $200 to Allie Brentt

September 10, 2018

The Santa Ramona Police Department is seeking a Japanese interpreter.  The position is for an immediate, temporary need and pays $250 per hour.  Applicants should contact Sarina Jade or Viktoriya Lasin at the SRPD general line.  A background check will be required.

Please reload