The Santa Ramona Chronicles

Local News & Events

H&C logistic Incorporated (HCLI) hiring

H&C logistic Incorporated (HCLI) is a multinational corporation involved with shipping, logistics, and the arms trade. The Company is moving a branch of their operations to Santa Ramona Valley! Are you an Operator? A criminal looking for a more legitimate but even more lucrative life style? We might just be the team for you! Now Hiring - executives, corporate spies, prior military and LEO, technology majors, scientists and academics Ability to adapt to surroundings is a must. May be expected to don military type gear, business casual, or formal wear all in a day's work. ((OOC- We are a neutral organization that heavily encourages white collar crime, corruption and political maneuvering. We w


Have you got the blues? Black dog stuck to you? Or maybe the district judge waived your sentence provided you meet a counseling schedule? Perhaps you can't get a significant other listen to you? We offer: *Counseling therapy *Motivational hypnosis *Relationship counsel Call us now (salina.amat)

Snow Ball Silent Auction Results

Thank you all who participated. Almost $24,000 was raised. Below is a list of the winners. Win a date with Anna Berg: $200 to Jasper Cross VIP Membership at Black Thorn Club $600 to Jasper Cross Diving Lesson: $150 to Angelyna Bennett A Christmas Story: $200 to Azariah Brentt Take Control with Eve: $200 to Allie Brentt Ghost Hunt or Reading with Jasper: $400 to Lakeisha Andrews Dinner & Lingerie: $1000 to Frank Castle Massage Therapy: $1000 to Frank Castle & $500 to Victor Rolakov Finger Bang Salon: $250 to Rhi Dahl & $60 to Eve Stone Dinner with the Gov: $5001 to Kasandra Dinner with the Mayor: $2000 to Lillian Llewellyn 2019 Lexus RX: $5001 to Kasandra Morgan 2019 Audi A4: $2000 to Lake

Help Wanted

Virtuous Vice Clothing Company is looking for models, male and female, for an upcoming winter fashion show. Must be available Saturday, December 22 from 6 to 9pm. For details contact Chiara Villanova (bethann.causten)

Mayor Castle Shows Off

Last night at Wolfe's "TGIMFF Wet Tee Shirt" event folks let down more than their hair. patrons were greeted by a giant water spraying unicorn. Notable local celebrities were there including Governor Stone (no surprise since his wife owns Wolfe's,) Chief Sarina Jade, Jasper Cross from the hit TV show Paranormal Investigations, Sophia Castle the renown violinist along with her father the infamous Mayor Castle. While there are rumors of Mrs Stone being up on the bar all reports have her staying full dressed. The same cannot be said of Mayor Castle. Apparently at the urging of several people the Mayor not only let himself get soaked for the wet tee shirt contest but "stripped down to his ti

SRPD wishes you a safe, happy and peaceful holiday season

The following Holiday Safety Tips were compiled, by the SRPD Crime Prevention Section, to contribute to the safety and security of people during the holiday season. The holiday season is always a special time of year. It is also a time when busy people become careless and vulnerable to theft and other holiday crime. We can never be too careful, too prepared or too aware. Please share this information with family, friends and neighbors. Driving Avoid driving alone or at night. Keep all car doors locked and windows closed while in or out of your car. Set your alarm or use an anti-theft device. If you must shop at night, park in a well-lighted area. Park as close as you can to your destinat

Now Hiring

The Kink Tank is hiring We are looking for the following staff to join us at the newest hot spot in SRV. Bar Staff - must be good with the public, full training given. Security staff - must be good at kicking ass, able to speak to the public a plus! Are you the strong dominant type? If so then we may have your ideal job! We are also looking for the men and women to fulfill additional roles. Details can be given on request! If you are interested pop in to the Kink Tank or call (555)-424-433 and ask for Lotus (Lotus.Saiman) or leave a message!

Small Business Grants Offered

"Get A Business Loan" is sponsored by the Castle foundation to aid small business. The main purpose is to give the citizens a chance to start their own business with a low level risk. The event is held as a contest. Each citizen can participate. If you want to start a new business or are you running one right now it does not matter. What matters is our plan, as Bane would say. Winners will be required to hold one event in cooperation with mayor's office and his staff. YOU have to open a business or run it! No money will be paid if the business is not opened. Applications should include your name (legacy and display,) the business name and your plan to attract business to your location. App

Mayors Office is Hiring!

Job job job! Yes! Easy money. What you have to do? Simple. Just apply for one of staff positions in Mayor Frank Castle's office and you will get a ride of your life or even better. Castle Foundation is responsible for running the office of Mayor Castle. He is in a desperate need of assistance, secretaries, bodyguards, PR faces and more. Contact the Mayors office (frankcastle88) ASAP


Virtuous Vice Clothing is looking for local models to help with their Winter Fashion Show, currently scheduled for the evening of December 22. Please call or stop by, no experience needed. ********************************************** ********************************************** Hungry and Lazy? Too Stoned to Drive? Call Feet Food and we will deliver your favorite SRV restaurant foods to you with only a 25% service fee! Call 555-555-5555. Delivery time averages under 5 hours currently. **********************************************